Are you wondering how to reconnect with your teen?
As kids get older they start to develop their own lives. Suddenly, the small child that relied on you for everything is practically grown – and the only thing they need from you now is a ride to their next social function and a few dollars for the excursion.
Based on my experiences, past, present and hopefully future, I’ll share with you these top five ways to reconnect with your teen.
Reconnect with Your Teen
Start A Hobby
While my children had interests that were completely their own, I also realized that there were a lot of things that we did have in common. After taking a quick assessment, I realized that the best way to reconnect with them at a more adult level was to create a hobby that centered around one of our mutual interests. A mutual interest for movies, art, computers or even shopping can lend to more time spent with the child who used to curl up on your lap.
Make A Date
It might seem like forcing yourself on the issue, and you might have to work extra hard to fit yourself into their schedule, but by setting aside a specific date for you and your child to spend quality time together you’d be surprised at how much you can re-learn about them. I’ve found that it’s usually easier to stay away from the weekends, since both of my children usually have their own plans, and I try to pick something that isn’t too distracting so that we can have plenty of time to talk, laugh, or just act silly.
Split Them Up
If you only have a single child then this isn’t really an issue for you. However, for families of multiple children, regardless of age, it’s important that you spend time alone with your teenager. A lot of times younger children can require a lot of extra attention and can distract you from actually connecting with the older child. Make a point to spend time with your children individually. Not only does it make them feel more special, but it gives you a chance to get to know them on more of a personal level.
See The Grown Up in order to reconnect with your teen
The hardest part in reconnecting with your teenager is being able to look at them not as a child, but instead as a newly emerging grown up with the same thoughts, ideas, and emotions as any other grown up. Try to make a point to talk to them as if they were a true adult, and ask for their opinions on situations. You’ll be surprised at how they’re able to express themselves, and they’ll feel more like you respect them for the person they are – not the child they used to be.
Reconnect with Your Teen but Don’t Try To Be Cool
In the midst of everything, it’s important to remember that your main function is to be their parent. While it’s tempting to want to blend yourself in tightly with your children and their friends, remain steadfast in your position as the parent in your relationship. I often tell my son that it’s not my job to be his friend; it’s my job to be his mother. By letting him know what my primary function is we have a stronger respect for one another, and I’ve found that I’ve become a better friend to him in the process.
Raising a teenager is tough. The constant struggle to keep them safe against the things that could potentially harm them is endless. By developing a strong relationship with your teenager, and finding a way to reconnect with the child you once knew, keeping them safe will be much easier. Remember to set aside time every day to talk to your teen, even if it’s only to ask them how their day went.
Sometimes the smallest efforts can make all the difference in the world. Find more tips here
Further reading
I hope you have found these tips on How to Reconnect with Your Teen to be useful . You might also like my post on positive parenting in the teenage years
and how to build a strong bond with your children
